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This Week In the Bulls: What's so circus about it?

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On Evil Derrick Rose, Joakim Noah's big night on LA and much more.

Kelley L Cox-USA TODAY Sports

This week in the Bulls: Derrick Rose sat out three games with a hamstring injury and the Bulls went 1-2; Pau Gasol developed a calf injury out of nowhere, but maybe that's what happens when you play a 34-year-old big man 35 minutes a game; the Pacers beat the Bulls at home without Rodney Stuckey, David West, George Hill, C.J. Watson and Paul George; the Circus Trip started in style with a beatdown of the Clippers; Boogie and Noah got heated again and the Kings walked over the depleted for an easy win.

The Bulls started their annual Circus Trip this week, a 14-day, seven-game vacation away from the Polar Vortex and into the clutches of hell.

Really, the Circus Trip is that bad. As long as the Bulls come out of this thing without any season-ending injuries, you have to consider it a success. Expectations are truly that low.

In case you didn't subject yourself to the annual infliction of pain that was Chicago Bulls basketball post-Jordan, pre-Rose, just know that the Bulls typically died on the Circus Trip before the elephants and bearded ladies even showed up on the west side.

From 1999-2004, the Bulls lost 37 straight games on this thing. 37! THIRTY SEVEN. That's taking you all the way from the last year of the dynasty era to season Ben Gordon and Luol Deng were rookies.

Every loss was such a goddamn beatdown. Utah defeated the Bulls by 45 (45!) in 2000. The Nets delivered a 32-point loss in 2001. In 1999, the Bulls lost by an average of 14.7 points per game. They couldn't even come within two touchdowns.

Then, in 2004-05, our white knights finally showed up.

deng-gordon-duhon

The Bulls' win over the Jazz on Nov. 24, 2004 is honestly one of my happiest memories as a sports fan. I remember watching it in my parents' basement and thinking there was just no chance they could pull out a close game in the fourth quarter. Gordon came off the bench to score 22, Eddy Curry scored 21 and Hinrich added 17 in a 101-99 win. The Jazz were led by .... Carlos Boozer, who had 18 and 13 in the loss. Good times.

Things have gotten incrementally less deadly on the Circus Trip over the years for the Bulls, but make no mistake: it's still brutal. This is where D. Rose tore his meniscus last season. There's nothing good that can come of it, really.

OK, there's one good thing that came out of it: when reporters explained to Joakim Noah what this hellacious road trip was all about in 2007.

Now you know, Jo. Now you know.

Doug McDermott just wants a picture

I do not know who the rapper Kid Ink is. I do know this is like my favorite set of pictures ever:

Doug McDermott a.k.a. Dougie Fresh a.k.a. Rich Homie Doug looks like a kid going to meet Santa at the mall in that first photo. In the second photo, the mall securities guards are like "dude, you're 22 years old and 6'8, get the fuck out of here."

You know how I do the Bulls Bracket every March? Cancel it this year, because we already found our winner.

Noah taunts the Clippers

Between Rose coming back, the addition of Gasol, the emergence of Jimmy and the development of the new bench, it seems like Joakim Noah has been an afterthought to start this new season. He had knee surgery for the first time in his life this past summer and has been a little slow to return. This is nothing out of the ordinary for Noah -- he starts slow every season before becoming the team's best player by January. This is how things work.

With that in mind, it was nice to get another reminder on Tuesday that Joakim Noah is our greatest civic treasure. He added 11 points, 16 rebounds and six assists in the Bulls' best win of the year, a 105-89 victory over the Clippers to start the Circus Trip. He talked shit the entire way through.

Noah vs. Boogie -- who you got?

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Alright, so last night didn't go as well. On the Circus Trip Scale of Brutality, though, this is like a 2 out of 10 so I'm not going to get too concerned about it. Not quite at the level of Noah's "Half Baked" explosion last year in Sacramento, but still pretty good.

This week in Pau

It's been a quiet week on social media for Pau with the injury, so let's go with a throwback.

Pau tea > Kermit tea. But that's none of my business.

Evil Derrick Rose steals some kid's jersey

I took a Vine of this last night not thinking much of it. This is because I am a complete idiot and should never be trusted.

Within 10 minutes, it was retweeted like 200+ times. Most of the people had the appropriate response -- to clarify, that would be the "I'm crying" emoji -- but there were also a lot of folks in my mentions who really thought D. Rose stole this poor kid's jersey. Well, don't step at D. Rose wearing a Rip Hamilton shirsey if you don't want him to steal your shit!

But for real, of course Rose is signing this and giving it back to the kid. It's just funny. Some people on the Internet couldn't understand that. Excuse my language, but WHAT THE FUCK?

THERE'S GOT TO BE MORE TO THIS STORY.

By the time I saw Sarah Spain tweet "Don't be starting rumors!" at me, I realized that we truly need to start a second Internet that excludes about 99.5 percent of the country. So I deleted it. Derrick puts up with enough shit already. There has to be more to this story.

The Booze News

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